Daughter Unbiased

Dear Mom, 

There is a gap between us. No matter how hard we try to ignore it, the slit will still remain. So I want to spew out what I think about it. I know it will do no sense at all for everyone can see it other than the visitor of my blogsite. It’s funny to know that this will not achieve its purpose—closure to our problem—now; however, I still believe in the power of time. 

The thought of ” I’m more of Dad than you” makes a wide space between us, or worse is between you and my siblings against Dad and I. Literally, a family feud. I have sensed it for months now, since I joined Dad in his family affair that produced a bit of argument between us. My instincts were confirmed just a long just a week ago when you used Patrick’s teacher to throw your opinion about me being “always” on the side of your husband. In the scenario, it seemed that I was taking every word you said as a shaggy dog story. You’re wrong Mom. What made me laughed in silence were your untold reactions. Mom, with all due respect, it was really hilarious. 

The day which gave you more reason to be jealous of Dad and I’s closeness was the day I felt like I have a father, not a financial provider. I have waited for this since day one. My childhood is more of you than Dad which made me love you more and him less. I do not really want to blame you, but I thought it started perhaps you being my close tie and whenever you and Dad argue it is only your side I hear. Brainwashing if I may say. Being innocent, I thought that the victim was always you; you were always right. Since my bonding time with Dad happened, I realized that all this time, I was being unfair to Dad. From then on, I decided to be a daughter to both you and him. I gave both ourselves a chance to act out our role efficiently. Adjustments should be expected and I know it will cause much argument between you and me. I want to be fair between you since none of you is a step parent to me. I wouldn’t want to choose. I believed you have noticed that each time you and Dad argue. I always defend Dad’s side because it is you whom I’m talking to. You are more empathic and understanding than him. And I know you have my brothers on your side. I don’t want Dad to feel alone. I think that defines true love. From now on, I will be a daughter to both you. I love you Mom, but I have to make up with Dad. And I hope you understand.